Cereal
Amanda Harter

Picture this: you're sitting down for a bowl of Honey Nut Cheerios for breakfast and the box is almost empty, but with your feeble hopes, you still pour yourself a bowl. Imagine your surprise when out comes a few Cheerios and then a nice big pile of Cheerio dust. "@#$%," you eloquently think to yourself. After all, you could make a nice big sandbox with all the dust that just fell into your bowl. Once the mist clears and you try to calm the dustiness with some milk, you just end up with a disgusting mass of Honey Nut Clay. The box never said, "Honey Nut Cheerios AND Honey Nut Clay." On the side panel the ingredients say "Vitamin C, Calcium, Riboflavin" but no DUST. The box does warn you that the contents may settle during shipping, but it doesn't say that they will dematerialize! I don't know about you, but I don't feel like paying $5 for a box of cereal when obviously you aren't going to eat that powdered part at the bottom. Maybe we should start a collection of all the dust and there could be a recycling program for the uneaten powdered portion of your cereal. Or maybe little filters in the bottom of the box so that you don't have to try to pick your cereal out of the little sand dune inside of your bowl. That could be dangerous if you accidentally inhaled a spoonful of it. I suspect that the presidents of General Mills and Kellogg's and all of the other cereal companies are aware of this quality control problem and are doing nothing to change it. I bet they have perfect cereal in their cupboards at home. They probably sit at home and laugh at us because they think we can't do anything about it. But the solution is to just find alternative breakfast foods. If we all did it, there would be nothing left for them to do except clean up that dust in their cereals. So until then I'm going to eat doughnuts. But, you know, there's that hole in the middle of doughnuts, what is that all about?


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